A Doctor for the Bush
Once upon a time in the African bush, the animals needed a doctor, because infections caused by the arrows of hunters and other epidemics were ravaging the wildlife world. Then his majesty the Lion had an idea and called his subjects at his court declaring :
"My dear compatriots, I have called this meeting to inform you that we need a doctor in the bush to treat the injuries caused by hunters, so I would like some of you to volonteer as a future doctor and each candidate will present his qualifications before his majesty, that is to say, me and myself, but also his shortcomings."
Candidates were numerous.
The Elephant, the Tiger, and the Monkey.
The Elephant began : "Your majesty, I consider myself fit to be the doctor of the jungle because I am tall and strong, I also have a trunk, which serves not only to collect gallons of water but it can be used to grab the weakest patients and put them on my back ..."
- Your defects, Mr Elephant, asked the impatient king.
- Your majesty, since I am heavy, I walk slowly.
- Next ! Patients may die before you arrive.
The Tiger introduced himself in his turn: "Your majesty, I can be the doctor of the bush because I am certainly in the best position. I can run at 100 MPH, I can also take patients in my mouth and climb a tree if necessary..."
- We understand but we are waiting for your defects Mr. Tigre, interrupted the king.
- Well, since I am a carnivore, I'll find it difficult to restrain myself when seeing a weakened animal.
- Next ! All patients are at risk of being eaten by you !
Then the Monkey introduced himself, smoothing the little hair on his head :
"Your majesty, I am certainly the ideal physician for the bush because I am the only person among us who is not only able to walk on all fours but I can also stand up like a man, I can even understand their words and serve you as a spy to warn you of hunters' conspiracies who run after you with their poisoned arrows."
- Let's come to your defects, if you please, Mr. Monkey ! Started the king.
- I don't have any, your majesty ! Replied the Monkey.
- Not any ! Emphasized the king.
- No I assure you, repeated the Monkey.
- Well there we are ! What we need is a doctor without defects ! You are hired, let it be known !
A few days later, his majesty had a sore eye. The doctor was called, he arrived badly dressed and growing bald like all the doctors, with a stone tied to his neck to listen to the heart. He examined the eye and declared that all was well.
The King insisted :
- Damn, My eye still hurts and you're the doctor, find what's wrong with my eye !
The Monkey plunged his hand into the eye of the king, plucked it out at once, put it before the king's nose and said : "Since you don't believe me, look at it yourself !"
Lesson : in the world of men as in the world of animals, Mr. Monkey is certainly not the only one to do "monkey business" to get a position beyond one's means.